In elementary and junior high, all the girls in my grade watched soap operas; the one my friends and I obsessed over was Days of Our Lives. Big M watched Another World. Early in my high school career, Big M had established herself a group of friends and they would do various crafts. Eventually, sewing was the art that stuck around. Big M and her mean friends would sit at the dining room table, making themselves skirts and muumuus all while trash talking every single person they knew; these were her friends she was talking about! What surprised me was that all her friends would still share every detail of their lives with her – I mean, she holds nobody’s secrets. NOT A SINGLE PERSON. I learned never tell her anything of consequence. As I’m sure you can imagine, her intense friendships were fraught with arguments, lies, compliments, flattery, and finally they usually crashed and burned. It got tricky when she befriended staff.
She befriended most of the staff and latched herself on like a leech; once she fed on them emotionally, or whatever it is narcissists get from these relationships, Big M just dropped them like a piece of trash. Once that happened, the usual bad-mouthing around town about what a bitch so and so was because they can’t “handle my Irish” started. This is why Jack and Maeve never had any real ‘couple’ friends for long. Most people saw right through her act and immediately disliked her rude, racist, uncouth, uneducated, cruel, attention-seeking behaviour - it’s simply exhausting. She treats service personnel with absolute disdain, returning food back to the kitchen multiple times.
The highlight of my days in my last year of high school was watching what the guy across the street would wear. I loved his style! He regularly dressed like Madonna and Michael Jackson and proudly walked around town. My father had to bathe and shower every time he SAW him. Dad would laugh like a schoolchild – I never (and still do not) understand why he cared about what other people did/do in their bedrooms, bathrooms, or living rooms. Why is it his business? Both the people raising me were catty, closed minded, and held some very rigid opinions about others. It was often like living a real life soap opera only this one seemed to be the Nut-House Edition.
In grade 13 I didn’t spend much time at home, I worked a lot of hours at the pharmacy and the cigar store. Brad and Sarah loved me and I loved them and their entire family. They had 2 adopted children and 2 of their own children and I often commented on how I wished they were my parents. In the beginning, they didn’t really understand the gravity of my words.
My last year of high school is also when I met my boyfriend, Ray. Ray and I met at a house party, I’m pretty sure I went by myself, I don’t remember going with friends though I must have because I am incredibly shy. I remember having a beer or 6 then deciding I needed to have a cigarette and walked over to the patio door, opened it and stepped out.
....and fell 2 stories. The balcony was being replaced and there was no tape or sign indicating the balcony had been removed – at 11pm it was pitch black out and I had no idea I would plummet to the ground. Fortunately, I’m hyper mobile and I managed to do a “break fall and roll” type of move (thank you Kung Fu class!) and didn’t even hurt myself. I was more shocked than anything else. All of a sudden Ray was next me, concerned, acting like he cared about me. What? Nobody cares about me; especially not boys. This was new. Turns out Ray wasn’t a boy, he was 4 years older than I was, so he was 22. Ray had a job and his own car, lived with his mom but was moving out to his own apartment in a few weeks. Ray and I dated for several months.
I experienced a lot of ‘firsts’ with Ray; he was kind to me and for once, I felt valued and special. I could see the possibility of establishing a life with him, maybe. I fell in love with Ray quickly and my parents never even knew he existed. I already knew they would disapprove because it didn’t matter what I did, they always disapproved. So I kept him a secret and would often sneak him into my bedroom or other times he would wait around the corner and I’d sneak out of the house. Life was actually good for me.
One day, after school, I could hear Maeve as I opened the heavy front fire door to the house; she was shouting, but not in anger, as I approached our apartment, I could clearly hear “…of course she’s fucking Brad. The entire town knows that’s what she’s doing. She a fucking home-wrecker.” Not knowing whom she was talking about, I walked in the kitchen to say the “obligatory” hello in a very cheerful voice. I see she has an audience today: 2 of the upstairs workers plus 3 friends; they’re sewing pillows. She sees me, narrows her eyes into tiny slits and points her shaky index finger in my face screaming at me that I’m “a whore for sleeping with Brad and that she will not allow me to become a home-wrecker living in her house.”
I have no response. No reaction. Where the hell is THIS coming from? Like WHAT DID SHE JUST SAY?
All I could say was, “What? I am NOT sleeping with Brad.” You fucking asshole.
I quickly left for my shift at the cigar store. I was riddled with anxiety the whole walk up to the plaza. I arrived and saw that Sarah was there with her best friend. I must have been in quite a state because as soon as I walked in the store Sarah took one look at me and came over to hug me while asking what was wrong.
Not knowing where to start, I stammered, holding back my tears : “It’s not true, she’s crazy, she told the town, nothing happened, ever!”
Confused, Sarah asks me what I’m talking about. I respond with “Maeve is telling people, like all the people in town and your friends, Brad’s business clients, EVERYONE that I’m sleeping with him. Sarah, I’m not sleeping with your husband.”
I wasn’t prepared for her belly laugh.
Sarah hugged me tight and told me she knew full well I wasn’t sleeping with Brad and not to worry about it. Apparently, people already knew Maeve was not right in the head. Brad filled her prescriptions after all. That’s when Sarah opened up and told me she saw and did not like how I was being treated at home. WOW! I had no idea people noticed. She right then and there offered to take me in to her home to live until I went to University. I explained that I could not because the deal I had with my parents was that they would pay my post-secondary in exchange for all my hours of work in the family business. She told me not to worry about it, they’d pay for my education too. I was floored, although they knew Maeve was crazy, they did not know whom they were truly dealing with. If I had accepted, Maeve would have ruined their business, reputation, and their lives. I wasn’t going to let that happen to these kind and generous people, I politely declined.
This is my one and only life decision I truly regret.
Just joining me? Start at the beginning:
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